Sick again

I'm sick again. J says "you're always sick" and I usually object to that, but I think he may be right. I used to have perfect attendance in grade school. I never got sick. But once I had kids, I started getting sick more often. My dad blames the kids - he calls them "Typhoid Mary" - and the germs they bring home from day care. Maybe pregnancy permanently altered my immune system. Recently, I've been reading / listening to some self-improvement books / podcasts. One that really hit home the week before last was saying that women don't deal with their stress, so it manifests as illness. I think this rings true and is probably why J doesn't get sick as much. I love him, and he's a great dad, but he doesn't internalize stress like I do. He's not constantly second guessing himself, his choice to work, his handle on work/life balance, etc.

I do everything I should to deal with it all; exercise, yoga, meditation, healthy diet. I try to go out with friends and indulge in a nice drink or two. I get a decent amount of sleep every night (more than J) and I take my multi-vitamin and herbs. So maybe I just have a sucky immune system.

Anyway, I went ahead and went to work this morning, only to be told literally, as soon as I got off the train, to "go home!" by a coworker. By 10 I'd heard it several more times, and finally my friend Emily said, "maybe what your body needs is to lay down and sleep today." She's so smart I had to listen to her, so I came home at lunch. When I got home, our house cleaner was here. I felt so bad, I said hi, then went straight to my bed and slept. WHen I woke up, she was gone.

Even while I'm trying to give myself permission to relax and recover, I'm still worrying about whether I can make up the workout I missed today. I am going to Mexico in a month, after all. Maybe I'll be able to relax then.